Why Christians shouldn’t see Non-Christian Counselors or Coaches

When you’re facing challenges in your marriage, it’s natural to seek help. But as Christians, it’s important to be mindful of where that help comes from. Marriage is a sacred covenant designed by God, and how you approach the issues in your marriage should align with the beliefs and values that you hold dear. That’s why, as a Christian couple, you might want to think twice before going to a non-Christian therapist or coach.

Now, I’m not saying non-Christian therapists aren’t skilled or compassionate or that you might not benefit from their counsel. Many of them are very talented. But there’s a significant difference in worldview that can’t be ignored. You see, as Christians, our understanding of marriage is rooted in Scripture. We believe that God created marriage as a reflection of Christ’s relationship with the Church. It’s not just a social contract; it’s a spiritual covenant. This means that our approach to resolving marital conflicts should be centered around biblical principles, not just psychological theories.

Imagine you’re working with a therapist who doesn’t share your faith. They might be great at offering communication techniques or conflict resolution strategies, but what happens when the advice they give contradicts your beliefs? For instance, a non-Christian therapist might suggest that personal happiness is the highest priority in a marriage. While that sounds nice, it doesn’t quite fit with the Christian view that marriage is about selfless love and sacrificial commitment.

Or, let’s say you’re facing a crisis in your marriage, and you’re encouraged to follow your heart or do what feels right. That sounds good in theory, but as Christians, we know that our hearts can be deceptive (Jeremiah 17:9). We need to seek God’s will, not just our own desires, when making decisions about our marriage. A non-Christian therapist might not understand or support this approach.

And what about the spiritual aspect of your relationship? A non-Christian therapist or coach might not see the importance of prayer, forgiveness, or relying on God’s strength to heal your marriage. These are crucial elements that should be at the center of any Christian marriage counseling. If your therapist doesn’t share your faith, they might overlook or even discourage these practices.

Now, I know what you might be thinking: “But what if we can’t find a Christian therapist or coach? Should we just not go to counseling at all?” Of course not! There are many Christian counselors and coaches out there who are trained and equipped to help you navigate your marital issues while keeping Christ at the center of your relationship. If finding one seems difficult, don’t be afraid to reach out to your church or a trusted Christian community for recommendations.

At the end of the day, you want a counselor or coach who understands the sacredness of marriage and shares your commitment to building a God-honoring relationship. It’s not just about getting practical advice; it’s about ensuring that the guidance aligns with the principles and values that matter most to you.

So, as you consider couples counseling or coaching, remember that your marriage isn’t just a partnership—it’s a reflection of God’s love. Seek out guidance that honors the truth, and trust that God will provide the support you need to build a strong, faith-filled marriage. After all, He’s the one who brought you together in the first place!